Saturday 17 May 2008

More pondering

What is one habit, negative pattern, or sin that has been passed down your family line from generation to generation that you do not want to pass down to your own family line? What steps are you taking to make sure the habit, pattern or sin is not repeated in your own family?

The thought to ponder this week from the Christian Women Online blog comes with a qualifier - "this question is not meant to condemn anyone, but to hopefully bring about a positive change in your family’s life", which supposedly makes it a bit easier to talk about a negative habit or pattern.

I find this a very difficult question to ponder because each generation is so different. In fact I think that my parents had already decided not to bring up the four of us the way that they were brought up, so I don't think that I can really say anything about previous generations and pick up on something that has been "passed down" the family line.

However, I do procrastinate (as has been mentioned on this blog before) as does my Dad! I don't have any children to try and discourage from this habit, but if I did then this is one of the major things about myself that I would hope not pass on! Dad and I have spoken about this a couple of times and we both know how bad procrastination makes us feel because the longer we put something off the worse we feel, both for not having done something and for having it still hanging over our heads.

Procrastination can cover anything, from the smallest task to the largest, and as Dad and I both know, it can be a vicious cycle because the longer we put something off the worst it gets as the task eventually takes on gargantuan proportions and gets put off for even longer because of how bad it makes us feel. This is not something I would wish on anyone; and the sad thing is that both Dad and I know how much better we feel when we just get on and do something, and yet neither of us seems to know how to break out of that cycle.

Like I said, I don't have children to avoid passing this on to, so that question doesn't really arise, but if it did then I'd like to think that I would teach by example, or perhaps be forced to teach by example as children are no respecters of procrastination! You do what you have to do otherwise family life falls apart when the laundry starts stacking up!

As my life is just me and the cat there is no-one that is affected by my procrastination, but then I have to think "yes there is - me!" It is a funny thing to say and may sound a bit egotist, but I AM affected by my procrastination as it makes me moody and grumpy, so I have a duty to myself not to indulge in self-defeating behaviours, but it is so hard to do and I think that it will be a work in progress for the rest of my life. However, they do say that in order to overcome something you need to understand it and I think that I am getting there with all this pondering on my blog!

5 comments:

Toknowhim said...

Thanks for participating in this week's meme... Pondering is a good thing. I too procrastinate, and that is also something that I would like to change for me, and my kids...

God Bless...

Trace said...

I was having a similar conversation with D the other night actually. I have a rather stubborn streak in me that comes from both of my parents. There are pros and cons to being stubborn, but I think I'd like to only pass down the pros! :) D has a bit of that on his side too which could make things interesting :)

Trace

Maisie said...

Isn't it so easy to procrastinate? I made my kids do all of their housework Friday night. Yet here it is Saturday night and I am planning on putting mine off until tomorrow because I am tired. I'm not being a very good example to my kids. They haven't said anything about it, but I'm sure that they notice.

lori said...

I LOVED that you joined us today...you know we HOPE we get to a place with our parents where we can see the REAL people they are...and not these "images of perfection" and then we can grow....

I used to get angry and just BE QUIET...drove my husband CRAZY, and I had to realize that I was doing what I'd seen my mom do..and it wasn't a healthy habit....
HE helped me change..and I'm thankful...

GREAT post...
Thank you for joining us!!
Blessings!
lori

Denise said...

Thanks for sharing.